Many of us have had formative experiences of being rejected, abandoned or hurt by people. These are experiences we feel not just in our thoughts but in the very fabric of who we are and how we view the world. We can say things to ourselves like “Oh, I’m not unloved. I’m not an outcast.” all day long, but that’s not enough to deal with the emotional core in us. We must have something higher to set us free from binding emotional pain or accusations against our worth as God’s children.
Many times in life, I’ve struggled with a sense of not being enough and saying to myself, “I don’t feel worthy…” What’s set me free from that sense of unworthiness has been setting my heart on a higher power. Here’s what I mean. If I feel like I’m not enough, then I will say, “I want to be a man who pours out God’s love on other people.”
Remember this scripture: “There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear…” (1 John 4:18, ESV). I think that we could put many things in the place of ‘fear’ in this verse. God’s perfect love casts out a sense of inadequacy. Perfect love casts out loneliness. Perfect love casts out defensiveness.
How do we come into a place of perfect joy and confidence? I don’t think it can genuinely come from trying to confess out what’s holding us back from those things or looking into a mirror and telling ourselves, “I’m worthy! I’m worthy!” Those actions aren’t powerful enough.
Constantly returning to what God says about us as his children, however, helps us not lose sight of his great love for us. Contending to be a man of God and live like Jesus gives us something greater to overcome those emotional pains and doubts that would color our decisions. This is why scripture tells us “…to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness” (Ephesians 4:23-24).