Listen to podcast audio:
God created every individual with a need for intimacy, but it can become distorted in the modern world. Broken families, abuse, neglect and even an unwillingness to rely on other people can get in the way of healthy intimacy. Nate Larkin and Gary Wilkerson continue their conversation about recovery from sexual addiction.
Key Points from the Podcast
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Patrick Carnes argued that sexual addiction might be better termed as intimacy disorder.
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We were created for intimacy—for relationship with God and others.
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Adolescents transitioning into the independence of adulthood are particularly susceptible to seeking intimacy and connection in the wrong places and in inappropriate ways.
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Pornography offers an artificial form of intimacy that seems safe and doesn’t come with the danger of rejection.
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In place of intimacy, men will often wrongly seek power, position, success, fame, etc.
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Maia Szalavitz suggests that addiction might be better understood as a learning disorder.
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Historically the church has incorrectly tried to shame people out of shame-based behaviors like sexual sin.
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Both abuse and abandonment can create wounds that lead to addictions.
Resources Mentioned in the Podcast
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Out of the Shadows by Patrick J. Carnes [book]
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Unbroken Brain by Maia Szalavitz [book]
Episodes Featuring Nate Larkin:
About Nate Larkin
Nate Larkin, the founder of the Samson Society and author of Samson and the Pirate Monks: Calling Men to Authentic Brotherhood, grew up as a preacher’s kid. He married his wife, Allie, on the day he graduated from St. Lawrence University, and they headed off toward Princeton Seminary and the ministry.
If you’ve heard Nate’s story, you know his plans didn’t work out so well. He was ensnared by a sexual obsession he couldn’t tame, and the fear of discovery eventually drove him to abandon the professional ministry. It’s a miracle his marriage survived.
After more than two decades of secret and steadily intensifying compulsive sexual behavior, Nate’s nightmare finally ended in a painful collision with reality. Today, he helps overlooked victims of the commercial sex industry – addicted users – find their way back to integrity and the true intimacy that every person craves.
