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  • Bicycles, Dancing Monkeys and Wax Statues

     

    Gary Wilkerson

    We often fight our weaknesses and attempt to cover our failures. Yet, Paul boasted in his weakness and reminded us that in our deficiency, God gives us his strength. Gary Wilkerson shares three Scriptural truths that were redefined for him, allowing him to live with greater sincerity and honesty. When you embrace your weaknesses, you'll begin to rely on a source greater than yourself.

    Gary Wilkerson: The title of my message tonight is by far, the most unusual title I have ever put upon a message or a sermon. I'm calling it Bicycles, Dancing Monkeys and Wax Statues. If you want to ever find this one online, it will probably be one of the easier ones for you to find, as we talk about bicycles, dancing monkeys, and wax statues.

    I think this message is going to encourage you. Last night, there was that sense sometimes the Lord, He tears down before He builds up. He gives and He takes away. Sometimes, there's a taking away of things in our heart that don't belong, and then there's the building up.

    Tonight, I pray that we would get build up in our faith. Let me pray for you that you'd be encouraged by the Lord tonight. How many of you just feel like you need to be encouraged? It's like a hard year, a hard week, a hard month, a hard life. I just want to be built up in my faith. If I leave this place, not only tonight, but later this week, just knowing that I'm loved, and knowing that there's a power in me.

    Knowing that there's a grace that abounds, that I can do all things through Christ, and that He loves me. We thank you, Father. Now, in the name of Jesus, just bless this word, speak through us in Jesus name, amen. In 2 Corinthians Chapter 12, 2 Corinthians Chapter 12, sort of the latter part of verse eight, Paul says, "Three times I begged the Lord for Him to get rid of it, but His answer was My grace is all you need. Power comes to full strength in weakness."

    "I shall, therefore, prefer to find my joy and pride in the very things that are weakness, and the power of Christ will come and rest upon me. Hence, when I am content for Christ's sake with weakness, contempt, persecution, hardship, and frustration. For when I am weak, then I am strong." I want to talk tonight about some ways that we might feel like we're weak, but in actuality, that is the way that God gives us strength.

    Cause us to be strong in our life. Everybody in this room wants to have strength and overcome obstacles and defeat enemies and conquer giants in our life and in our land. The methodology that Jesus speaks to Paul about saying that I'm leaving this thorn in your flesh. This beating of Satan, this problem, this crisis in your life. I'm leaving it in your life for a purpose that when you understand the weakness that you have in your own strength, you'll begin to rely on a source greater than yourself.

    Once you begin to rely on that source greater than yourself, then you're going to find a strength from heaven, from God, but also abiding and living in you. That gives you a grace to be strong in the Lord and the power of His might. That's a glorious thing. I want to talk about these three things first. The bicycle, then the dancing monkey, and then the wax statue. The bicycle is when-- I have to come down here for this.

    I actually was going to try to get a bicycle up here in the front row. Can you see me okay in the back? Are the lights still shining on me? Not that I really need the spotlight, but I just want to make sure you're able to see me and my wonderful expressions as I'm preaching here tonight. Can you follow me here on the screen too? What if I go like this? Back up? Okay, I'm getting distracted. If I had a bicycle here tonight, I would tell you the story of when I first learned to ride the bicycle.

    How many of you remember being taught to ride a bicycle? Did anybody learn on your own without anybody teaching you? One, two, three, four. Okay, let's give a corporate sigh, like, "Aw. I'm so sorry you had to learn to ride your bicycle on your own." We'll give you a hug after the service here today. It's not a fun thing. Most of us, and then how many of you had your mom teach you how to ride your bicycle? Raise your hand if your mom taught you? One, two. Okay, that leaves 99% of you in here today-- Who taught you?

    Congregation: Dad.

    Gary: Dad taught you to ride your bicycle. Dad may not have done anything else in your whole life, but he taught you to ride a bicycle. Let's all say, "Thank you, dad." Thank you, dad. Can you be a volunteer for me today? Do you mind coming up here or does that make you shy? You feel shy? Can you come up here? All right. What's your name? Say again? Brooklyn. Cool. What a great name. Brooklyn, like from New York.

    Yes, that's cool. I used to live in Brooklyn. Brooklyn's going to come up here. I didn't have a bicycle to illustrate this, but Brooklyn, you're going to pretend you're going to ride a bicycle, okay? He's looking at-- You see yourself? You look good. Look at that handsome young man. What's with this, man? Where's this come from? Ireland? That's cool. I like that. All right, so you're got to pretend I'm your dad. If I'm going to teach you how to ride a bicycle, where do I usually stand? In front of you? No, behind you.

    What do dad do? They grab the back of the bicycle, right? Remember that? Then we and then we pushed it ahead. What did we say? I remember this is one of my early childhood memories. What did I say to my dad? Anybody think of what I might have said?

    Congregation: Don't let go.

    Gary: Don't let go or let go?

    Congregation: Don't let go.

    Gary: Okay, I thought you said let go. I thought Irish are much bolder more than Americans. You guys are-- "You let go, Dad. I can do this myself." That's really cool, the strong Irish people, but most people will say, "Don't let go, Dad." What does Dad say? "I won't let go." That's what I said. That's what my dad said. That's what I said when I was teaching my three boys and my daughter. They said, "Don't let go." I said, "I won't let go. Just keep pedaling. I won't let go." Then what does Dad do? He lets go. Usually, what happens to the child?

    Congregation: He keeps going.

    Gary: He keeps going a little bit, but 9 out of 10 of them?

    Congregation: Wobble.

    Gary: Wobble. How many of them--

    Congregation: Fall.

    Gary: Fall. When you rode a bicycle, do you ever fall? Yes. Good job. Let's give him a hand. He did a great job. Thank you. You can go back to your seat. Over here. There we go. When my dad taught me how to ride a bicycle, I asked him, I was afraid. I was very fearful as a child. I was afraid of the concrete. The concrete, that's where you scrape the elbows and the knees. I made a compromise with my dad.

    He really wanted to teach me. I said, "Okay, I'll learn. You can push me as long as you, number one, you hold on. Number two, I want to learn on the grass, not on the pavement, on the concrete." How many of you know what happens when you're riding a bicycle on the grass when you're first learning? It bogs you down, it slows you down. You can't pedal. He was trying to teach me on the grass.

    He's having to push me more, and then I couldn't get any momentum up, so as soon as he let go after promising he wouldn't let go, I would fall over, but it was okay because it was on the grass. It was in a safe area, but you can't learn when you're safe. You can't learn when you're trying to stay in control. You can't learn without taking a risk of falling. You can't learn, you can't move ahead, you can't progress without in a sense, realizing your weakness and having to move into a strength that can come your way.

    Nick, can I use you as an example as well? Come on up here, Nick.

    Nick: I'm going to ride a bike?

    Gary: You're going to ride the bike. Okay. All right. Now, does this look a little bit weird?

    Congregation: Yes.

    Gary: It feels a little bit weird. Okay, you can sit down. Why does that look weird? Because he's too big to be learning how to ride a bicycle, right? It's appropriate at a certain age to get a certain kind of help along the way. At a certain age, you become a grown man. When you're a grown man, you're certainly still dependent on the Lord, and there's certainly still a weakness in you that His strength has to come through you, but there's a certain time as well where I believe the Holy Spirit says to you, and He says this actually to Paul.

    He says it's in Timothy, "Act like a man. Grow up. Don't let your fear control you." I know sometimes in the church we in our-- and it's right to say, please don't hear this as a correction or any desire in my heart to want you to change, your language, your heart. Sometimes we use the language like it's all of Jesus and none of me. Will then just die and go to heaven. He needs some of you here.

    Some of who you are needs to be here, and you in your body you're not Jesus. It's not all Jesus, it's all Jesus and then He brings you into Himself and says, "I want it to be all of me, all of Jesus, but I want it to be all of You as well. The two of us together, your weakness will become strong." You learn to go and so. He says, "I'll never leave you or forsake you." At sometimes He seems to let us go and it feels nerve-racking and it feels like we're really weak, but it's in that weakness, He makes us strong.

    Because He's sending us into new horizons and new adventures and new hope and new dreams and new realities of accomplishing things we could not have accomplished unless we took the risk, and we're willing to fall. So many Christians are more conscious of sin than they are of the grace and power of the Holy Spirit and so they're living in sin fearfulness, rather than in grace accomplishment. They're living in a sense of, "I will not try anything because if I try something, it might be the flesh."

    Maybe a young man is asked to preach a sermon at the church. He goes, "Just there's such flesh in me." "Why is there flesh in you?" "Because I want to preach, that's the flesh because I have a desire." No, it's not as God put that in you. Do it with joy and passion and power and life and then ride. Ride like the wind. Go for it. Just pour it out. Let it go. For me, there's been some falls. Anybody else taking some stumbles?

    You skinned your knees, your elbows and what do you do? The Bible says if you fall seven times you get back up. The righteous gets back up. It doesn't say the righteous don't fall. It says they get back up and there's a sense of Holy Ghost gumption. Do you guys use that word here? A gumption, an inner sense of, "I'm going to stand. Having done all I'm going to stand. I'm going to keep standing." You keep riding that bicycle and you keep standing. When you fall, you don't say, "I'm too weak to go on."

    You say, "In my weakness, He's strong." He gives you strength to continue the journey and take you to heights places you'd never go before. I learned to ride a bicycle when I was a baby, a little kid. The last few years I've been riding bicycles, about 70, 80 kilometers some days, I love to ride. I have a street bike and just go and go and go. I'm just like, "I'm full of sweat and I'm exhausted."

    I get home and it feels so good to be able to do something that almost seems like I didn't know how to do before. That's what God wants to introduce you to. Whether it's a business or an idea or a vision or a dream that you might have. He's not interested in just you being religious. He's not interested in just like the only good service you might have is to be an usher in the church. That's a really good thing. He likes you being a plumber and a doctor and a lawyer and a farmer and a chef at a kitchen.

    He loves you doing all those things. He sees those as spiritual. He's saying, "I'm going to teach you how to do these things and cause you to live and even if you might fall." Some of us are so afraid of falling, we don't actually take any risks. We don't go anywhere because we think we're not going to be able to do anything.

    For me, I had to re-- This is going to sound strange when I first say it but hold with me.

    Would you prefer I get back up here or you're okay in the back? I'm okay here. Okay. For me, I've had to redefine what I believe about certain scriptures. It doesn't mean that the scriptures aren't infallible or the true but I think I got to the point after falling a couple of times that maybe I'm interpreting scripture the wrong way and maybe I need to redefine that. This is one scripture when I think about falling, and it says that no- have you heard this one, "No weapon formed against you shall prosper."

    Congregation: Prosper.

    Gary: Bible truth. No weapon formed against you shall prosper. I believe it. I quoted. Sometimes it's probably on your refrigerator, no weapon-- or bumper sticker on your car, no weapon formed against me shall prosper. How many of you believe that? No weapon formed-- How many of you have maybe not experienced that exactly? Can you be honest? Thank you for your honesty. I'm going to be honest with you.

    The Bible says, "No weapon formed against you shall prosper." It feels to me like hundreds of weapons are prospering against me. Tons of weapons seem to be prospering against me. Four kids and several of them became addicted to drugs. That seemed like an enemy prospering to some degree or another. I had a experience I think I told you about this little bit last year where the doctor found a little lump in my throat.

    She said, "It's just probably nothing. Let's do a quick little biopsy and it'll be fine." She called me on a Thursday night after the biopsy test came back in and she said, "You have cancer. You have thyroid cancer." I went, "Oh my gosh," it's like my mom died of cancer. My nephew died of cancer. My niece died of cancer. Two of my sisters had cancer. The word cancer is-- It's like, the doctor says, "Hi, you're dying." She hung up the phone, and I said, "I don't really know what thyroid cancer is.

    I know enough about cancer. I know certain kinds are bad and certain kinds are little more treatable." I went to Google. I know you did it. You've done it. You've done Google. I typed in thyroid cancer and it pretty much just screamed at me, "You're dying. You have about a week to live." You can type almost anything into Web MD and it will say, "You're dying." I have a runny nose and my eyes, "You're dying."

    It said you're dying. It was two types of thyroid cancer. One, you have about six months to live. It's a really severe kind. The other kind is-- If we're going to get cancer, it's the best kind to get. It's highly treatable and very low impact on the future of your life. This was a Thursday night and she said you have cancer but I didn't ask what kinds. I didn't know there's different kinds. Online I found there's two kinds so I called her back that night she didn't answer.

    I called her back Friday she didn't answer. Saturday, the office was closed. Sunday, I don't have an appointment till Tuesday. She doesn't come back till Tuesday. For five days, I'm like, "I'm dying. Kids come around to your dad because he's dying." I was a wreck. I talked about-- If there's any strength and weakness, there was a lot of strength in me at that time because I was just like, I was telling my wife where the will is in and what our insurance policy is and calling long lost friends like, "I'm sorry. I hurt your feelings in 1983."

    I just really thought and then she went in and said, "No, you got the good kind." I was like, "Good." That made me happy. I've been through experiences like that where it seemed like, "The cancer seems like a weapon to me. The enemy. A drug addiction seems like an enemy." I started asking the Lord it’s like, "Okay, you're teaching me to become stronger. You're teaching me to ride and yet I'm falling. I'm getting hit. I'm getting--"

    It's not like I'm just falling over for lack of balance. It's like cars are coming off the street and running into me That's what these weapons seem to be doing to my life. It seemed to be crashing into my life, causing pain and anxiety and worry and stress and fear. We're Christians so we say, "No weapon formed against us shall prosper." You just want to say baloney. Just want to yell at them. You just want to choke somebody and say, "It seems like all these weapons are prospering. It seems difficult."

    I had to be honest about the Scripture. I totally believe it is, but it gave me a whole and I ask the Holy Spirit about this, "What you can have to describe this to me? What does that mean that no weapon against me shall prosper?" It gave me a whole new picture, almost like-- I'm sure you didn't see in any movies that don't have anything rated other than G, but there's a movie called Gladiator.

    If you've ever seen that, they had the shields out and they move forward when they were fighting against the enemy. That was the whole new picture that the Lord gave me about that scripture verse, "No weapon formed against me shall prosper." It's like I'm moving forward, and the enemy is fighting hard, and they're throwing spears. Some of the spears like, "That spirit just hit my shoulder."

    Then we're in the middle of battle and all sudden, just like a knife just cut across my leg and I'm limping and rock is got thrown in and hit me in the head but no weapon that's formed against me is going to prosper because even though I'm bloodied, and I'm beaten, and I'm tired, and I'm weary, I have the shield. I have a sword and a forging ahead and the Lord is with me. He's right behind me saying, "Keep moving ahead. I'm not going to let you go."

    Maybe sometimes it feels like he lets us go because we're in the middle of battle. We don't see Him but He says, "He'll never leave us or forsake us," even though he may not be steering us because if He was holding on steering everything we did, He would not be training as the Bible says training our hands for war. We have a warfare we're in and in the middle of that battle, sometimes you get beat. Sometimes you get hit.

    Sometimes you feel like you're on your last leg near destruction. Sometimes you want to give up. Sometimes you begin to question God, "Does this thing really work? Is this Christian thing really real?" It felt good when I came to the altar, whatever I did, when I first got saved, it felt really good. Sometimes even now, when I'm singing songs, like Hallelujah, I want to raise my hand I feel good. But inside my heart, I'm really hurting because I'm really wondering if this is true, and this is real.

    If it is, why is my life sometimes in such turmoil? It feels like these weapons but they're not prospering. The Bible is true. The Bible is the Word of God and God has told us it's not going to prosper. Come what may, trials, tribulations, pain and sorrows, suffering, hardship, heartache, cancer, addictions, divorce, the doctor giving you a bad report, the money not being there, none of those things are going to prosper against you.

    Because you're going to say, “Through it all, I've learned to trust in Jesus, I've learned to trust in God. This battle is what's caused me to learn how to trust.” It would be nice if we didn't have to go through the battle. We were built into the men and women of God by being in that so the bicycle is something that helps us go.

    Then there's the dancing monkey. Last week or two weeks ago, three weeks ago, I was in the Ukraine and I was preaching there and we stopped overnight in Kiev and went for a walk with a missionary friend. We were walking through the downtown market area of Kiev.

    This guy kept following me with a monkey on his shoulder. Have you ever seen these kinds of monkeys that wear the vest, the red vest and have the little black hat on and then they have shoes on and they have these little things that clap together like with their knees? Sometimes they have an accordion or something like that. They put the monkey down and the monkey goes kind of like this and you're supposed to give them money.

    Well, I was watching this monkey and the monkey was like, he was dancing on the street. That's kind of cool, right? He looked really sad. Really. I know this sounds like a really weird thing to talk about. The monkey was dancing. He was doing exactly what he was told to do to earn his keep to get his food to get life sustenance. The owner would give him something and it was kind of a bargain, then, "You'll go out on the streets and you'll dance and you'll make money for me. You'll perform really well."

    I could tell just look at-- I didn't want to give him any money because it's like that monkey looks miserable. He's like it's just like, I wanted to cry like, "Oh, poor monkey. I'm sorry, I will take you home except you're really ugly and all." This monkey was like a mess but he was dancing and stuff. I began to think about my own life and maybe our life in this room here today is how we have this bargain relationship with God.

    I've had to redefine my whole way of working with the Lord so that I'm not bargaining with him. You'll keep me from cancer. You'll keep my kids from living in sin. You'll give me the new apartment, or house, or flat that I want. You'll help me with the car, you'll help me with the career, you'll help me meet that guy. You’ll help me meet that girl. You'll do these things I want.

    If when in turn, what I'll do for you is I'll pray, and I'll tithe, and I'll give, and I'll serve in the church. Even if the girl is good looking enough, I'll even become a missionary if you required of me. Whatever it takes for her. There's this bargain situation, I will dance for you as long as the bargain's kept on your end, you got to keep feeding me. That's not the kind of relationship Jesus wants with us.

    I've had to redefine the word, abundant life. Abundant life because when my kids were on drugs, one of my son is homeless for a while, I don't feel like I have abundant life. Do you ever feel like it's like, that's another thing okay? No weapon formed against us shall prosper. Then He says, "I come to give you life and life more abundantly." A lot of us, if we're really honest with one another, we might say, “I could hear it preached, I could read about it in the Bible, we could sing about it at church, but in my heart, I don't feel it.

    I don't feel like this is abundant life. I feel like this is a struggling life. I feel like this is pain-filled life. I feel like this is hardship life. I feel like there's nothing abundant really very little abundant about that except one day I'll get to heaven then experience abundance there.” The giving of abundant life is not speaking in that place of-- when He's speaking of Heaven, He speaks of eternal life. But this place, He's speaking of life and abundant life meaning that He's going to give you life here and now and it's abundant.

    My bargain with God, "Okay, I'll serve you, I’ll love you, I'll tithe, I’ll pray, I'll give, and in return, you keep me safe. No sickness, no low income, no struggle financially, no relationship problems with my wife and spouse, my kids are just perfect four perfect A students are getting the best grades and getting them into the best schools and having the best careers." That's my bargain with you, God. You know that bargain doesn't-- God doesn't bargain with us. Have you noticed that? He doesn't bargain with us.

    I've had to redefine what abundant life means because if we think abundant life is what is preached in a lot of least United States churches, like abundant life is you're rich, and you're famous, and you're healthy, and you're good looking, and your kids are perfect and everything is-- and you live in the best house on the block. That's a testimony for Jesus. They're going to want to come to Christ because they see how prosperous, and healthy, and problem-free your life is.

    We make this bargain with God and we call that abundant life. I kind of lived that way for too long thinking abundant life is a pain-free life or a happy peppy, bursting with love kind of life all the time. The Holy Spirit just as He helped me redefine the scripture verse about no weapon formed against me prospering, He's helped me redefine what abundant life is. Because the western idea in the church of abundant life, according to our western idea, then Jesus didn't live an abundant life.

    He would not-- Our description of abundant life, we would look at His life and say, “Hey, Ian, I'm not signing up for that. I'm not dancing for that. I'm not going to work for you to get that from you.” What did Jesus have? He had friends who totally abandoned Him, miracles that He did that crowds-- Like He rescued mommy's little girl from death and then she abandoned Him. He had-- "Foxes have holes but I have no place to-- I don't have a home."

    Some so misinterpret the Scripture and then talk about Jesus being materialistically rich on earth because He had this coat that was so valuable that they tore into four pieces. Look, I could give you a Hugo Boss coat tonight, a $1,000 jacket and if you're still homeless and not having an income, would you be rich then? No, you'd have one item that's wealthy. These people say like, “Well, Jesus had this wealthy coat, so he must have been wealthy and that’s abundant life." No.

    Jesus and then He was taken to the cross and He was beaten, and He was abused, and He was hit, and He was struck with a sword in the side, it seemed like weapons forming against Him would prosper. It seemed like if this is what you call abundant life, I'm not dancing for that. I'm not signing up for that. The definition of abundant life for me changed almost the same way that the no weapon formed against me shall prosper.

    Is abundant life for me now is the doctor says you have cancer, I say, "I have life." My sons are having some trouble at one point in the future, but I say, "I have life in Jesus." Maybe there's a marriage problem in your life and you go, what you say, "That’s not what I want it to be but I have life." Abundant life is through it all. No matter what kind of hardship you're going in, no matter what you're suffering, no matter how difficult your life might be, there's an abundance in your heart. It's life.

    The “zoe” you talked about this morning. It's the spirit of life in you. It's not just the physical things around you. It's the spiritual life that God has given you. The good news is when you understand that, then the dance becomes natural. To me, the most amazing dance I see are like somebody with cerebral palsy. Their body is wrecked, they can't really move but they can raise their hand and they just go, “Thank you, Jesus.”

    I'm going, “You're thanking Jesus?” I have a problem because the paycheck didn't work out as good as I thought it. You’re raising one hand because the other one wouldn't move and you're saying, “Thank you, Jesus,” that's abundant life. Now and I'm not saying, please don't misunderstand me, I'm not saying that it's everybody who's poor and broken and hurt that they're the only ones who can have abundant life. You can have abundant life. Paul said, "I know how to abase and I know how to abound."

    For him, abundant life was it's not in the abasing or in the abounding it's in the life in Jesus. It's knowing Him. I wrote a book a while back called Ultimate Favor and to me, I appreciate God's favor. I really do. Bettina who travels with me, she has this miraculous gift of God's favor. Anytime we go to the airport, she gets, like, upgraded the first class and the hotel said, “We're going to put you in the suite.”

    I'm like, “I get at the closet, and I get your flight’s canceled.” It’s like she must be living-- she must be dancing, right. She's dancing getting the favor, I realized that there is that kind of favor and I like it. I asked for it, and I pray for it. I pray for a good marriage and healthy kids that they do well in school and they get a great college and they have wonderful children themselves that make me a great grandfather who's thrilled with life. I pray for those things, but I realized ultimate favor and that's what I wrote about in the book.

    Ultimate favor is not in those things. Abundant life is not in those things. Ultimate favor and abundant life is what Moses talked about when God said to him, “Hey, you can go into the Promised Land, there's milk, and there's honey, and there’s ease, and there's comfort and there you have your land and your kids can grow up there and you're going to have fun, but I am not going to go with you." Moses says, "No, I want ultimate favor. That's a favor to let me go into that land, but ultimate favor is I won't go anywhere unless you go with me."

    That's abundant life. That's favor of God is when He's with you. Whether you're abounding or abasing, whether you're up or whether you're down. Then you may be asking the question of, I understand a little bit about trusting the Lord to put you on a new journey. That journey might cause you to fall at times and there's difficulty as you define His grace and His abundance through His presence, that you make it on a journey and that you don't have to dance for this you want to because of His joy.

    Then you might be asking yourself self the question. "Okay, that makes sense, but what does this thing about wax statues?" In the early Roman time period, there were sculptors like Michelangelo type people that sculpted marble for the Roman authorities, those in government or the very wealthy. If you saw their homes they might have a statue of a soldier or a lion out front of it. They sculpted these things out of marble.

    When the sculptors were doing this, they became so famous and quite wealthy as they made this marble for the elite of the society. As they dug the marble out of the ground, they began to run out of what they call statuary marble. It's the good kind of marble that has no flaws in it and it's not porous. It's like just smooth and solid. They started finding this other type of marble. I think they call it travertine.

    I don't know if you'd call it that here, but there's an American, they still call it, you can buy the travertine marble. The problem with travertine marble is that it's porous. It's not been pressed in the ground quite as long, like a diamond where it presses it together in that statuary marble just puts things together so there's no flaw in it and it's hard and it's easy, but it's also once you sculpt it, it's there.

    With the travertine marble, it had holes in it. When they began to carve, let's just say there were, they were carving a statue of one of the gods of Rome or something like that, muscular, like me. Thank you for laughing. That makes me feel really good. They're carving this thing, but they were carving it with the travertine, so it would have pocks in it and holes in it. The face might look good, but there's like, well man, the guy looked like he had bad acne when he was a kid or something.

    It was all messed up. What they did is they would take the good, statuary marble and sand it down, and they would take the dust of that good marble and mix it with a wax. Then they would put that wax on top of the statue and just begin to sand that in there so that it began to look like statuary marble. They took the poor marble and made it look like the good marble. Then they would bring that to the owners that they sold it to and it would pass muster.

    No one could tell that it was any different even if it got close, once that wax hardened. From all indications externally, it looked like it was going to- everybody could accept it. It looked good, but it didn't really change it did it, it was still travertine. It still had the holes in it. As we're on this journey riding our bikes and we fall and it feels like weapons are forming against us and it feels like we don't have abundant life.

    I close with this, our temptation in the church is to say, "I don't have any holes in me." Is to say, "I'm not travertine. I'm not an earthen vessel. I'm a statue. I am flawless." That's how we present our self and yet we've fallen off the bicycle and yet we're dancing for our food and yet we're been beaten by the enemy at times and we've been buffeted, as Paul said. He was shipwrecked and he was beaten but he was forging on.

    The good thing about Paul, he writes in this passage, we started this message with, was that he said, "I could glory in all the revelation I've had." He says, "I've been to the third heaven." I have no idea what the third heaven is. I studied it. Maybe some of the scholars here might do that. The first heaven, second heaven, obviously if there's a third heaven, there's a first and a second heaven.

    Then he goes, all Tom Cruise on us because he says like Tom Cruise says in one of his movies, "I could tell you, but I'd have to kill you." In the Greek, it actually said no, but Paul says, "I was into the third heaven and I saw things--" He actually says, "unlawful for me to speak." Jesus said, "Look at this, but it's against the law for you to go back and tell anybody this." That is a hard secret to keep that he could.

    Now everybody's writing a book about it. They go to heaven, they write a book about, what's in heaven and weird stuff. I don't want to get off subject. Paul, when he comes back and he says, "I could glory in that. I could build a whole conference on that. "I was in the third heaven. How many heavens you've been in? You haven't even been in the first haven't yet. I'm already after the third heaven. Next year Lord's inviting me to the fourth heaven."

    He could have boasted in these things. Instead, he says, "I'm going to boast in my weakness. I'm going to boast that there are some holes in me. I'm going to boast that I fell a couple times. I'm going to boast that I'm not as strong as you might think I am. I'm going to boast it, that I failed a couple of times. I'm going to boast that if without the Holy spirit, man, I'm really messed up. That's what I'm going to boast on them. I'm going to come to church with holes in me."

    Sometimes I'm going to ask people, "Would you pray for me? Because this hole, man, it's ugly, it's a mess and that scar and that beating I took and that fall off the bicycle. The in the sense of always kind of trying to dance for my meal to make God happy so I get stuff, I realize I do that junk and it disturbs me and be honest."

    I really believe addictions would be cut in half in the churches if we started getting honest with each other. I believe men who look at pornography if we got honest with each other and found a group of men that you really trust and begin to share your heart with, I believe pornography in the church will be cut in half. I believe divorce, I believe suicidal thoughts, I believe depression, I believe anxiety, I believe stress.

    I believe all of these things that are holes in us that are beating us, that seem to ruin us at times. I believe all of these things if we don't try to cover them with wax, the Latin word for that process that they did, you know what they called it? Really strange. We use the word today in English, they called it sincere. Is from two Latin words, sin meaning without and cere, meaning wax, without wax. If they sold something without the wax in it, they would be afraid they would make a profit.

    Sometimes if we feel like we try to sell ourselves to our fellowship without the wax, unless we're acting sincere.

    You know what acting sincere is? It's being sincere, it's without wax, it's without putting a mask on. It's without covering yourself up. It's about hiding yourself. It's not about being afraid of what others might think of you. It's about coming to church and not feeling like you might not being okay with not being spiritual that day.

    Maybe not raising your hands, maybe not shouting to the Lord, maybe not clapping. We just go, "This is not a clapping day. This is a painful day." Through it all, you're forging ahead. Through it all, you have the shield out there in the sword out there. Maybe it feels like He let go, but He's right with you and there's a victory. There's a victory for you.

    Do you understand that? Do you get that, that it's okay to be honest? It's okay because that's what's Paul's talking about here tonight when he's saying that, "That's what I glory in, my weakness." Not that he's proud of it, like, "Look how much of a failure I am." He's saying this, "You're all real without wax." I am real without wax and together we can become the body of Christ that helps each other grow, that helps ride to ride the bicycle, so to speak, or helps each other know how to dance for our food.

    To not be like in the dancing monkey, to be real, to not put on the monkey uniform, to not try to make it on our own, but just trusting God for our life, trusting Him to do great things. As I've redefined these things in my life--and our worship team, if you guys would come back and we're going to sing a song and I'm going to invite you forward for prayer in just a moment. If you just need to get real with God and get answers and get help and get hope and allow Him to say, "Come in your weakness and we'll pray that strength will come into your life."

    For those of you that feel like you've not had the abundant life, feel like you've not had that, that the weapons seem to be coming against you and defeating you. If that's you in just a moment, I'm going to ask you to come forward and we're going to pray. We're going to believe God will do something. As I have been through these experiences, I'm like Paul a little bit, just teeny, teeny little bit that I could actually say my weaknesses are actually the areas He's making me strong in.

    That He's actually been bringing grace and power in areas. You might feel like you're too weak to merit God's favor, His presence, His abundant life, but you're not. Your weakness is what He calls forth to make you strong.

  • The Healing of Our Hearts

     

    Gary Wilkerson

    There's often a snake in the garden—a difficulty in your life to battle. And in those times, you can wrestle with temptation. Usually, these struggles are tied to a core wound or trauma you haven't found healing from. Gary Wilkerson dives beneath the surface to help you uncover your core wound and how you can find healing through Jesus, community and self-love.

    TRANSCRIPT (click to expand)

    Let me pray for us. I want to speak to you about healing of the heart tonight, healing of our hearts. Jesus, we thank you that we have heard from Pastor Nick that you want to do breakthroughs. You want to break through the difficulties, and the pain, and the crisis, and the problems, and bringing us to a new place. I ask for a favor tonight. Allow this word to speak to our heart in a way that just ministers. Just fill this room right now with a sense of possibility.

    The things we think maybe would never be resolved, the problems that we have that we think we may never overcome, the crisis that we find our self in that seems like it's just gone on too long no matter how much we've prayed, believed, heard words of promise, and yet our heart is still breaking. Our wounds are still hurting and the relief doesn't seem to be in sight. We're asking tonight for a word from heaven. We're asking tonight for the healing.

    As you said in The Old Testament, you called it a balm, a healing oil, a balm of Gilead, an oil to sab, to put on a heart that would heal that heart. We thank you for the healing. Father, this may not be a shouting word or a hip hip hooray and hallelujah word, but it's going to be a deep word. It's going to touch our hearts, and it's going to heal many people in this room. We now give you thanks in advance for that.

    I don't want to preach this just kind of wondering what outcome it will be. I preach this with a confidence in the Lord that you have called this word because you're accompanying it with your power to do exactly what you want to do. We give thanks for that, in Jesus' name. Amen.

    In Genesis 3:1, it says, "Now there was a serpent more crafty than any other wild animals the Lord God had made, and he said to the woman, did God really say, 'You must not eat from the tree in the garden?' The woman said to the serpent, 'We may eat at the tree of the garden, but God did say you must not eat of the fruit of the tree that is in the middle of the garden. You must not touch it or you will die.'"

    Verse 4, "You will not certainly die," the serpent said to the woman. "For God knows when you eat it, your eyes will be open and you will be like God knowing good and evil." In Genesis 1, 2 and 3, we see the formation of the garden. In the garden, he puts the man, and then soon after he puts his wife there, but it's the same place where the snake is. The snake, the serpent is in the garden as well.

    One of my worship pastors back home was telling me a story of his little boy who's probably five years old at the time. He was up on top of the stairs. As he turned the corner to walk down the stairs, there was a towel that somebody had left, a bath towel. Somebody had left it at the top of the stairs, and he tripped over the stairs and he fell down the stairs, rolling over and over.

    His father saw this and he was at the bottom of the stairs and he caught him just before he hit his head on the bottom of the floor. He grabbed him and picked him up and he said to his son, "Aren't you glad the Lord had me here to catch you?" The boy said to his dad, "Wouldn't have been better if the Lord would had just moved the towel?"

    If you think about that for a moment, there's a lot in that about our own life. We're happy the Lord catches us. We're happy He lifts us up out of our trials and tribulations, but wouldn't it be better if we just didn't have to go through them? What's the deal with that? We see in Genesis chapter 1, there was a snake in the garden. Why did God put the snake in the garden?

    It answers that, and I don't want to get into too much theology here in this, but the answer that we see much later on. When they were brought into the Promised Land and Joshua brought them in, and the Lord says to him, "I'm going to keep five enemies in the land." I was thinking why was that? He says to teach them how to war. Why was there a snake in the garden? To teach them how to war.

    Why were there five enemies left in the land? To teach them in the war. I suggest to you tonight that it wasn't just Genesis chapter 3 that there was a snake in the garden. Can I say to you tonight, there's-- Here's my life experience, there's always a snake in the garden. Just about the time you start to enjoy the garden, the snake approaches, and starts lying to you, and starts trying to deceive you, and starts trying to empty your faith and hope and confidence in the Lord no matter what you're going through.

    40 years of dealing with hurting people, 40 years and even beyond that when I was a little boy being around Teen Challenge, that my father started, and seeing broken lives, and seeing people come from all kinds of difficult backgrounds of abuse. Then not only being abused upon, but now beginning to abuse their own bodies, and some even abusing others, and violent streaks and all these things.

    For 40 years of hurting people and broken hearts, and collapsing marriages, and addictions that seem too difficult, and then in my 40 years of pastoral counseling, I'm at a new place in life and I just want to be honest with you tonight, can I do that? I don't really want to preach to you, I've preached probably 4,000 sermons in my life, I'm not only tired of hearing sermons, I'm tired of preaching sermons.

    When they get sermonic and they have the rhymes and things that, and I'm just going like, “I just want to hear it, I want life,” I'm tired of just hearing sermons, I'm tired of going to church services, and singing songs. Here's why I'm tired of it because I just know firsthand that so many people are singing the songs, and hearing the sermons and they're leaving, and they're going back home and their marriages are falling apart, and their teenage son is on drugs.

    They've just been diagnosed with cancer, the job is on the chopping block, you may lose it at any moment, there’s some that leave church singing a happy song, they have a clinical depression in their heart, and in their mind they don't know how to get out of it. All the Christians are telling them like, "I rebuke that in the name of Jesus," and they're saying like, "You rebuking it is making me more depressed rather than helping."

    I don't know this sounds gloom and doom here tonight, but there's an answer to this, the snake is always in the garden, the enemies are always in the land, there's always going to be a need and it's going to take more than songs and sermons. It's going to take more than a singular prayer of deliverance, putting my hand on your head and saying, "In the name of Jesus come out." Is going to take you and I being honest and saying, "There's a snake in the garden, there's a problem in the land, there's an enemy to be fought, there's a battle to be won, there's a victory on the other side for us," but we're going through something tough.

    It's time to take off the mask, and it's time to quit playing church, and it's time to get honest with one another, it's time that the church become more honest than AA, rather than AA being more honest than the church. It's time to have small group meetings that aren't just talking about who was Zerubbabel's cousin's ring that he had on his fourth finger, and start talking about my heart is breaking, my marriage is falling apart, my finances are crumbling. I cry myself to sleep, I'm worried about my kids, I'm anxious and it's time to get honest about these things, it's time to deal with these things.

    How do we go about this? That's what my talk is about tonight. How do we go about this? Number one I would say it's through relationship, it's through relationship. You don't know that from the time you're in your mother's womb, the Bible says that God created you, He formed and fashioned you in your mother's womb, did you know that? Scientists are just catching up to the word of God, now, and they have proven now that while you are being formed in your mother's womb, the very thing that your mother feels, you will feel.

    They are being able to put these sensors on those mother's womb, and if the mother is anxious and worried, the blood pressure of the child rises. If the mother is depressed, they sense the movements of the child echoed the depression, and the movements, the lack of energy, vitality, and the baby in the womb. The baby in the womb is very connected to the mother.

    My wife was so wonderful she prayed over our children certain things, and the Lord gave her a song for each of the four children. What amazing joy now to see my son 30-something years old, singing his song that my wife wrote for him to his babies. They're speaking to their children even in the womb because there's a God-given, even before you can hear, and see, and understand, there's a God-given connection between an infant and the mother.

    There's a link there because God has built us to be attached to people, the need for attachment, some people might call it belonging, or connection, community, the Bible calls it love, we were built for love. So we had in our mother's womb this need to be loved and connected. The scientists have gone on to say if the mother hates the child, and is considering abortion, and maybe just hates the fact that she's pregnant, that that child will have problems at a young age oftentimes. Unless there's a resolve to that because they feel this un-attachment, a lack of attachment, a pulling apart, even in our childhood we see that.

    Now, skip ahead to longer in time, have you ever noticed an older couple, let's say they're in their 80s or 90s or nearing 100, and they're healthy, and they're vibrant, and they're loving the Lord, and one of the spouses dies. Does anybody know what happens pretty rapidly? The other one seems to follow rather quickly. When my father died my mother was in good health, but nine months later, she passed away as well.

    She fought cancer for 60 years victoriously and then succumbed to it in eight months because of just-- It's the need for attachment. From the cradle to the grave we were built to love one another, we were built to have community, we were built to be attached to one another. Something happens and then again, I'm just talking to you like your 40 years of pastoral counseling, like if you were sitting next to me on my couch, and I was just talking to you about heart issues.

    One of the things you see about this in childhood is this need for attachment, something strange happens because I don't know how you were as a father, you don't see fathers here, but my attachment to my children had-- I'm trying to think of the right word here, had certain type of strings attached to it. I'm going to be real proud of you, and real happy, and hug you, and put you in my lap when you're performing well.

    When your room is clean, man you're a great kid, when you score the touchdown or you kick the goal in the football game you're, "Well, I'm so proud of you," just the sense of attachment connected to achievement. When you lose that attachment, when there's the lack of the type of achievement that the father or the mother want, then the child begins to get confused.

    There's actually a video, it's called Still Face, it’s amazing video done by a Harvard professor, and he took hundreds of children, little children two years old, and had their mothers sit right in front of them face to face. At first, the mother is smiling and touching the baby's face, and the baby is just smiling, and joyful, and laughing, and stretching their arms out.

    Then the doctor says to the mother, "Now, just cover your face like this, and don't move, don't have any emotion, no smile, no anger, nothing just a totally still face." You see within seconds that baby at first gets this confused look, and then a few seconds later it reaches out to this mother with alarm, and then starts making almost violent sounds like, "U-u-uh," and crying, and then before long the baby's screaming.

    The mother is not yelling at her, the mother is not abusing her, the mother's just still, but the baby gets confused because it's not that sense of attachment, of love, of connection. Then all of a sudden, the mother then just because of the smile on her face, and you'd see literally the baby's shoulders just goes down, "Aaah, Mama's back." So many of us have grown up in homes where the sense of belonging, or love, or affection, or attachment is related to our behavior and our performance.

    When the performance is good there's, "Aaah, come to papa, come to mama," but when the performance is bad, there's a rejection, there's an accusation. This is not a sermon on tips to parenting, but let me just tell you one that has changed in my mind. When my kids used to misbehave, I would give them a timeout, anybody ever do that, do you do that here in Ireland, anybody? Wave at me if you give-- Have many of you been on a timeout?

    Pastor Nick spent years in timeout-- No, I'm joking. [chuckles] I would give my kids this thing called timeout, and if you don't know what it is, say you're around the dinner table, and they're getting loud and like, "Oh-oh," you know something, "Be quiet, I'm trying to talk to mom." Then, "Oh-oh," they talk louder, and they're talking over one another, and I say, "Be quiet," and they don't listen, "Okay, that's a timeout, go to your room," and they go to their room.

    I realized something there and I'm not saying it's not-- There's times that has to be done and there's a good thing about that, but what I realized is what was happening is when my children, listen to this carefully, when my children were being themselves I was punishing them for it. How many of you know children are loud, and children like to move, and children like to sing songs, and they to throw spaghetti. I mean, it's just that's what kids do.

    Whenever they did something that they weren't supposed to do, I would separate myself from them. I no longer with my grandkids, now, I've got a new practice, I don't give them timeouts, I give them time ins. So I say,

    "Let's go over here because there's something wrong. What is it about some of the rules we have as a household that are hard for you to understand because I want my grandkids to understand that the sense of belonging and attachment is not related to them behaving up to my standards all the time.

    I'm not saying there's no need for discipline. I believe in spanking. I believe in timeouts, but doing it in a way to where they're not getting their sense of I belong when I'm doing good, I don't belong when I'm doing bad. The problem with that is when we learn that at a young age, we project that onto God. God loves me when I'm doing good, but He pushes me away when I'm not doing good.

    That's why we call it coming back to the Lord. Well, He never left you. You don't come back to somebody who's never put you away in timeout. He's always been with you. He says "He'll never leave you or forsake you." He's there with you and He's helping you through that snake in the garden. He's helping you through that giant and the enemies in the land. He is not just-- Why? Because He belongs to you and you belong to Him.

    There's that sense of attachment to the Lord. There's a connection with Him that will never be put off on His part, maybe on ours but not on His part. If we grow up in an environment where attachment is linked to certain behaviors, what we begin to realize is to be authentically myself is dangerous. If you are-- so my father was a rather serious kind of man, and some of you may have picked that up, listen to a few of the sermons he's quite serious.

    My brother and I we love comedy, we love fun. I remember one time I was telling him a story, I said, "Did you see that comedy thing on last night on television?" The guy said this and that. We both laughed and my father got- he raised his voice, said, " That's not funny. The Lord is not pleased with that." Then I went, "Oh, all right. I don't know why he went like it was pretty funny. I thought it was like-- I think I don't know. So okay, being funny is not safe. You lose attachment if you're funny.

    What you got do is get serious and get-- but I am not built that way. I'm not built like sort of the bony finger prophet. I'm built like I have a sense of humor and I love to laugh and I love to play games and I love sports, but I didn't feel like I was supposed to because if you're a good Christian and want attachment to the Lord and want attachment to your family, then what you've got to do is got to be serious.

    Everything you have to say has to be a quote from the Bible and you have to wake up in the morning and say, "I was praying for six hours last night before I went to sleep, father and I just want you to know the Holy spirit gave me a revelation of the new covenant." I was like, no I was dreaming about girls and so it's hard to be yourself if authenticity is connected to attachment and when your authentic self, you don't get that seat. Then what happens is you grow up with a wound in your soul.

    If I could sit down by one with each of you, I could probably in an hour’s time talk to you and we could probably discover together what is that core wound in your heart, what is that thing that-- what is that trauma? What is that event of a sense of no longer being attached, no longer being connected, no longer feel like you fit in. Does some of you in this room ever-- You're in a crowd, you're in a crowd here right now, but you don't feel like you really belong?

    You go into a room and there's four or five people and you just feel like you're the outcast. That's a sense of detachment, of not belonging. That comes from trauma. That comes from some trauma. As a pastor, I see this all the time. Even recently, I was with a pastor, he's no longer pastor now, but he's still in ministry. He ministers to pastors who are addicted to sexual immorality and pornography and he tells his own story of being sexually abused as a child multiple times by multiple people.

    He kind of stuffed that in and gave his life to Christ and he sort of stuffed it and didn't deal with it. Later in life, some issues with pornography came up and then later in life, even after pornography-- He said it was the strangest thing in the world as a Christian pastor he started visiting prostitutes and he told me. He said, "I can't believe it." He said, "I remember on Easter Sunday morning on my way to church to preach my Easter Sunday sermon stopping and picking up a prostitute and being with her before I went to church that morning."

    Obviously he quit the ministry and he got help, but he talked about the trauma in his life and how that trauma caused a wound in him that he was confused as to who he was as a man. He was by no means excusing his sin and I'm not excusing his sin either. We have to deal with that but there's sometimes these wounds in our heart are the birthplace of some of the sin that we might still be responsible for but might find ourselves caught in because of those wounds of trauma.

    There are some people in this room here, like that pastor who had to deal with certain issues in our youth. A close friend of mine, we were talking just a couple of weeks ago, my wife and I with our friends, she was telling us when she was a little girl, her mother would lock her in the closet if she misbehaved and she'd be there for some times, 15, 16, 17, 18 hours, no food, no water, no bathroom.

    Her mother would then take her out of the closet and tell her, "You're worthless. You're no good. You're nothing." That's a trauma. That's a traumatic event that builds a core wound. People begin to say, "I'm not enough, I'm no good, I'm worthless, I'm hopeless, I'm not loved, I'm not accepted. I'm not worthy of love. I'm not worthy of belonging. I'm not worthy of attachment."

    You see, most children, they don't blame their parents for the trauma that takes place in their life. What they do is they blame themselves. They say, "It must be me. It must be my fault that I did this because I don't want my parents to be bad. I want them to be good. For them to treat me this way, they must be good parents and I must be bad." You start saying to yourself, "I'm defective."

    I think to some degree, everybody in this room, even the most healthy and whole people in this room could honestly say I'm defective because I am-- and you could fill in the blank. I'm not enough. I'm not good enough. I'm not strong enough. I'm not smart enough. I'm not. I'm not prayerful enough. I'm not holy enough. I'm not righteous enough. I'm not-- Whatever enough, we fill in the blank of that thing saying there's this defect, there's this wound in my heart.

    Are you following me so far? This is a tough one to speak. It almost feels like taking the air out of the room. That's the first type of trauma is, the first type of trauma are things that should not have happened to you that have happened to you.

    A child should never be hit, struck, abused, physically, emotionally, verbally, or sexually but there are many people that have faced that type of trauma in their childhood or being locked in a closet or were like Nicky Cruz, my friend Nikki, who grew up where his father was a warlock and his mother was a witch and she would punch his face when he was five, six, seven years old, punch his face till his eyes were closed and blood almost sealed his lips.

    It got so bad that when he was nine years old, he climbed up to a tree and put a rope around the tree and put the rope around his neck. If his older brother did not come and rescue him, Nikki Cruz would have taken his own life because of the things that should not have happened to him, did happen to him. There was a snake in the garden trying to destroy his life.

    There's another kind of trauma that maybe more Christians have in reality, but it's often undealt with as well. These are not things that should have not happened that did happen, but these are things that should happen but didn't happen. Are you following me? The first one is things that should not happen that did happen to you. The abuse, the trauma. The other type of trauma is the things that should have happened to you that didn't happen to you.

    Doctors and counselors tell us that this kind of trauma is often more difficult to deal with because the more physical, the more the things that clearly I should have not been struck. I should have not been abandoned. I should have not had that happen to me. I should not have that said to me. That's easy to start. Not easy, but you know it's there and you begin to deal with it maybe at an early age.

    Whereas this second type of this withholding of things that should have happened that didn't happen, it's kind of hard for us to deal with because we feel like, "Well, I had good parents. They were nice. They were kind, they were happy," but there were certain things that should have happened and oftentimes those things didn't happen to you that should have happened to you because they didn't happen to your parents that should've happened to them.

    They should have been connected. They should have had affection. They should have had belonging. They should have had attachment. They should have been loved. They should have parents notice them and care for them and hug them and touch them and be affectionate towards them. They never had that, so they can't pass that on to you. Therefore, you know they're good parents and they're kind to you and they provided for you but there's this sense of something should have happened.

    There's a belonging that didn't happen and that causes this thing to feel like-- That just doubles down on this core wound of I'm not enough and so you start giving a language to the not enough-ness. You start giving it language. I'm not enough because I am lazy. I'm not enough because I'm fat. I'm not enough because I'm short. I'm not enough because I'm not a good athlete. I'm not enough because my parents were like this and I'm like that.

    I'm not enough because I'm a preacher's kid and they're so holy and I'm not. You have all these things that you began to see. Now I'm going to close in just a few minutes, but here's what happens. When you get to that place in your life where you have this core wound inside and let's just say it's like I'm not enough, maybe that's your core wound. Well, what you're going to do with that to try to compensate for that, to try to correct that, what you do is try to build your own life. I call it a false construct.

    You begin to construct a life that says, this is what I believe about myself, but I have to prove that wrong. If I believe I am stupid, then I'm going to try to read every book and sound intelligent and I'm going to spend my whole life trying to compensate for this sense, or if I feel like I'm a failure, I might be driven to make a lot of money to feel myself successful, or if I feel like I'm not accepted by God, I might try to work really hard at religion and fast and give money away, and make sure everybody knows it because I want to compensate for not feeling this way. I want that core wound to not be a reality in my life.

    The way it cannot be a reality is to try to prove it wrong. For me, I grew up never feeling like I was enough. No matter what I did, it just didn't feel good enough. It's not something that comes from an abusive family. I have a good family but there's just that sense of something lacking. Inside of my heart, I just feel like I'm never enough. Do you know how I'll be enough? When I preach good enough.

    You know when I'll be enough? Is when I lead enough people to the Lord, or when I go to enough conferences, or when I start the admissions department. When I do these things then I-- One of the worst ways you can live your life is what I call the when I, then I. When I make enough money, then I'll be happy. When I meet the right woman, then I'll be happy. When I get divorced from the wrong woman, then I'll be happy.

    When I become a pastor, then I'll be happy. When I get to retire from being a pastor, then I'll really be happy. This always this when I. There's something more. It's called-- If the desire is to construct a life, I'm going to build a life on, when I get this, then I'll be happy, then I'll be joyful, then I'll be spiritual, then I'll be alive, then I'll be enough, then I'll be sufficient, then I'll be smart, then I'll be- whatever it is that we're looking to become but it's a false construct. We're building this life.

    I'm building a life on ministerial success. It's like, I want my church to grow then I'll feel successful. I want my book to sell a lot of books, then I'll be successful. I want to look on YouTube and find out how many people have watched my sermon then I'll feel successful. How many of you know-- If you don't know now, you're certainly going to learn it. Those are things called external validation.

    It's things from outside. You go like, "When I get enough money," that external validation, "then I'll be happy." You realize when you get that external validation it never makes you happy. There's nothing externally that can make you happy. It's the joy of the Lord that is our strength. It's something inside of us. It's not something that comes from outside of us.

    It doesn't come from more money. It doesn't come from fame. It doesn't come from success. It doesn't come from popularity. It doesn't come from followers. It doesn't come from ministerial success or business success. It doesn't come from having lots of children. It doesn't come from anything outside of you. It comes from what the Holy Spirit puts inside of you.

    He puts his love and his sense of attachment towards you, and a sense of belonging and connection. He's telling you that you may not have that from your father. You may not have had that from your mother. You may be seeking it from the world, but you'll never get it out there. You get it in here. It's when Christ lives in us. One day I had this vision, I guess you call it a picture. Just in my mind, I thought of constructing this life. The core of it is is a sandy foundation, not a rock.

    The core of it is this foundation that says, "I'm not enough." I'm building a life that I am going to prove I am enough. I'm going to be the most spiritual, the most holy, the greatest preacher, the greatest minister and leader. I'm building this big construct of a life that thinks that I begin to believe the lie of Satan, that then you'll be enough when you get there. I'm up on top of this building and there's scaffolding.

    Do you call it scaffolding here? The things on the side of the building that helps supporting the scaffoldings built all around it. I'm on top of this and it's beginning to sway a little bit. I'm thinking, "This thing's not on a good foundation. My whole life is not built on a good foundation and I call out to Jesus, "Jesus come help me. This building's rocking." Jesus grabs, hold of the scaffold in the bottom. I'm going, "[sighs] I'm glad you're here Jesus. Help hold this life up of mine."

    All of a sudden he starts rocking it back and forth. "Oh, oh, Jesus, wait a minute. What are you doing? It was better when you weren't here. It's worse now. You're not helping. You're rocking the boat. You're shaking the scaffolding. This building might crash." The Lord says, "Good. Let that destroy this temple and in three days, I'll rebuild it."

    Let that old life be destroyed. Let that old construct of constantly earning and striving and pressing and driving and feeling like you're not enough, and you're not sufficient, and you're not loved, you're not accepted and you don't belong. When you believe that kind of lie, it's almost impossible to not build your life, constructing a life that is on the sand.

    When there's a shift, here's one of the things you have to do is, let there be a shift to realize, "Wait a minute, this is a hard shift." You might be 40 years old and for the last 20 years, tonight maybe you're realizing, "I have this core wound, and I have been trying to compensate that for my whole life. I've built this business. I've built this marriage and I've built this family on a false construct on sandy ground."

    It's hard to admit that when you're 40 or 50 or 60 or 70 years old, because you don't want to admit it. You don't want to go like, "These last 20 years of my life I've been living in a way that's not healthy, not whole, W-H-O-L-E. There has come this sense of letting it crumble, of realizing that, that which is built on the sand is not worth keeping up. It's good to let it go.

    When you let it go, you're going to have to do something. Jay and I were around Teen Challenge a lot. They were detox. When you're on drugs for a while, the first few days, you're going through detox and then your body's hurting and you're sweating, and your stomach is sick. When I help people get through moving this false construct over, they go through a detox because they're so used to getting the external validation, more money, more success more fame, more popularity, more acceptance, more approval of man, more applause.

    They're so used to getting that. When they realize that's the wrong way to live their life of false construct and they let that be torn down. They just feel like, "What do I have left?" Can I suggest to you tonight? That's a perfect place to be. That's a great starting place. Allow yourself, you have to go through detox. Let your body detox from fame and success and notoriety and popularity and acceptance of man, because once you detox from that, then you can put your life on the rock, and something solid can be built.

    For me, there's this glorious shift because I used to spend all my time and energy planning and plotting and driving. Not a godly ambition. My own ambition to become great and successful. All my decisions were-- What decisions are going to be born out of that kind of heart? They're never going to be spiritual. They're never going to be holy. They're always going to be corrupted by the flesh.

    My decisions were very carnal so many times. Even in building ministries, it would be like I'm building my own kingdom. The Holy Spirit does us a favor. He lets that be destroyed. For me, there was this great transformation. I see the shift in my heart constantly where there was once a building that said success and fame and notoriety and popularity and accomplishment, then I'll be enough.

    That was broken down when I went through detox, and now on this other side, there's something really different. "It's so fun. It's so just like, "[sighs] I can breathe finally. I have a life. There's my wife. I actually enjoy her. There is my kids. I just want to cuddle them and my grandkids. I don't have to go spend six hours in prayer. I can be holy wrestling on the floor with my grandkids." Because once that building of power and authority and success and fame and notoriety. Once that was torn down, the Holy Spirit started building his construct.

    Do you know what that's built on? Whole different language. Love, and peace and joy, and patience and kindness and goodness and contentment and delightfulness and freedom and just these good things that feel good in the heart. If some of us tonight would see that false construct torn down and allow the Holy Spirit to build something, you're going to finally and fully enjoy being a Christian.

    Right now you're supposed to enjoy it, right? If you don't, you're going to go to hell and it's fear-based. Like I‘ll get a timeout, an internal timeout and to be no attachment and so this is a fear-based thing and you can't build on that foundation. The transfer over to this is a love base. It's like I'm accepted. I'm loved. I will close with this. In this transformation, I realized just how much God loved me. What a great delight it is?

    He loved me. This was so hard for me to say. A matter of fact, this was so hard for me to say. I'm still struggling saying it to you even tonight, even though I believe it with all my heart that Jesus accepts me just as I am. I always have such caveats on it. Not if there is sin in me. Not if I'm not performing well. Not if I haven't been in my devotional life the last three days. There's a lot of caveats to that.

    With Jesus, there's no caveats. There's no restrictions on that. He loves you just the way you are. He will never love you any less, he will never love you anymore. He loves you just the way you are. Many of us know that intellectually, but we don't feel it in our heart.

    We don't feel it because just the way we feel about ourselves, we project that onto God. "I'm never enough and I'll never be enough for you. I'm not good enough. I won't be good enough for you. I'm not smart enough for you. I'm not good enough preacher. I'm not a good enough preacher for you." We project that into our spiritual life, and when we do, we just live in pain. We live in sorrow. We live in brokenness and we just never get healed.

    We never get healed, we get encouraged, we get revivaled. It's not even a word. We get built up in faith. We get admonished, we get encouraged. We have up times, but we're never healed in the heart because as long as we're living out of that lie, that core lie, then you're going to always build a false life. Let that be destroyed and come over to this side and finally realize how much God loves you.

    Secondly, and closing, realize that God wants you to love yourself as well. That's hard for me to say, because I said that a few weeks ago, and I've got all kinds of emails from people saying like, "You're listening to the devil now. I thought you used to be a good preacher. I thought you were David Wilkerson’s son, how could you say such things?" I'm going to say it again, God wants you to love yourself.

    I'm getting these emails, and I'm thinking, "What's the alternative?" No, God wants you to hate yourself. God wants you to feel like a perpetual worm who's nothing but ready to be cast into hell at any single moment, but He doesn't really love you. He saw Jesus do something. The Father saw Jesus do something nice for you. Therefore, He has to kind of cover you and He's covering you. God says, "Well, I don't want to look at that one but since you're covering him, Jesus, I'll let him into heaven because- but don't don't let me see him because I don't like him."

    No, Jesus likes you and He wants you to like yourself. He wants you to be comfortable in your own skin. He wants you to breathe and He wants you to wake up in the morning and feel like, "This feels pretty good to be me. Feels pretty good to be alive." Jesus said this three times in the New Testament, "Love your neighbor as yourself." The word there- there are several Greek words and one is brotherly love. One is more of a passionate love, affectionate love.

    This one is the supernatural powerful love of God. The unmerited favor of God that's called agape. Have you heard that word? The Greek word of agape. Here's what Jesus is saying. He doesn't say flatter yourself like brotherly. You would think he would say brotherly love others as you brotherly love yourself, but He doesn't use that word. He uses the word agape. Agape others. The way you agape others, I want you to agape yourself.

    That's what Jesus said. Agape yourself. The word there means unconditional love. So many of us have conditions, "I'll love myself when I, then I'll love myself." When I do this, then I'll be loved by God. Then I'll be accepted, then I'll accept myself. Two things tonight. One is be healed by realizing that God loves you so much. Number two, be healed by realizing that God wants you to love, accept and have compassion and kindness for yourself.

    Don't be hard on yourself. Don't beat yourself. So many Christians just beat themselves up. It's just like if they're not black and blue from their own beating, they're just not happy. They love to come to church to have somebody yell at them how bad they are because that makes them feel like maybe they're in good company at least. That's not the way God wants you to be. He wants you to have compassion on yourself.

    To wake up in the morning and say, "I'm happy to be alive. I'm grateful to be alive." I'm grateful even when the snake is in the garden. Even when there's hard times around me. Even when maybe I don't feel these things, but I can know it and I can receive that. Stand with me if you would, please. I want to pray for many of you in the room here tonight. I pray that we could be honest enough to deal with some of the things in our life that you're hearing the Holy Spirit maybe speak to you tonight.

    Not quite sure where to go with this. Part of me wants to give an altar call because I'm kind of used to that. Have people come to front pray for me, but part of it wants to make it a little more private, just kind of like you doing business with God without you having to maybe step out of your seats. Let's go that direction, just allow it. Miracles can take place right there and I love the altar call. I love the time together. There's something about the Holy Spirit moving that way.

    Without any music, without doing the altar call, can we ask the Holy Spirit to do a supernatural work of healing in this building tonight? Can we ask him to mend broken hearts? Father, I pray right now in the name of Jesus for those who have had things happen to them that should have never happened to them. Out of that, they've built this life that is like, "I'm going to compensate for that."

    I pray over them right now. I pray that you would heal that hurt. That they would not just repress it and push it down and say, "I'm not going to pay attention to that." They would allow you to bring it to the surface and that's painful. It's dealing with some things we don't need to deal with.

    I pray that it would go beyond just me praying for them tonight, but I pray that they would find like my pastor friend, who was dealing with pornography and addictions. 15 years ago, he started a meeting with a group of friends and they brought healing to his life and he's been free from that for 15 years now and helping minister around the world.

    Father, help us be like that, that we'd find a group of people, a good Christian friend that we could call that we could be honest with it. That we go beyond just a prayer meeting here tonight and go into a whole new lifestyle. Whole lifestyle of openness and connectedness and community because we were built that way from our womb to our death. We were built to share life with others.

    Help us not to try to fight our battles alone, to try to heal our wounds alone. That's where those lies begin to penetrate. That's where those lies over your life, my friends. That come in and when you're alone, the enemy can say to you, "You're not enough and you're not good and not worthy and not acceptable." When you're with the body of Christ, you begin to learn the truth. I want to encourage you and I pray over you now that you would find community, true community.

    If you don't have it, I pray that you'd be the forerunner to make it a reality. You'd be the first and invite others into it. I pray secondly for those who there were things that should have happened to you that didn't happen, neglect. You are meant to be loved and honored and given attention to and affection and you didn't receive that and you never heard anybody say, "I love you."

    You grew up in a performance-based home. I just pray over you right now in the name of Jesus, that the Holy Spirit would reveal to you what that's done for you. How that has made a sense of false construct and that we would just tonight be willing to let you rock that thing to let tip topples over. That we would say no more, no more in our life, God. Thank you, God. You take away the flesh and you bring in the spirit. You take away ungodly ambition and you put in there peace and joy and contentment, freedom and life.

    Just overwhelming sense of the presence of the Lord. We thank you for that. We're asking now, in the name of Jesus for miracles in this place tonight. I just feel words are so inadequate to deal with the business you're trying to deal with tonight, Holy Spirit. How you want to mend broken hearts? How you want to put salve on the hurting places? Holy Spirit, we just take a moment just to allow you to begin to speak to our hearts.

    Maybe even help us identify some things that we have not really thought of before. Again, we don't expect to have it all accomplished in one night but we can believe something might be birthed here. Then maybe I'll throw this whole week as Pastor Nick has already said, "This is going to be a week of breakthrough." Maybe tonight, it was just launching this by saying-- Helping us identify, "Hey, yes, there are some snakes in our garden. There are some things we need to breakthrough."

    Maybe tonight we just start with that just accepting the fact that there are some things that we need to do business with God as I've heard it put before. We just pray in the name of Jesus again, that any area of this life that we would not leave here tonight, discouraged or despondent. We would leave here very hopeful that we have a really good Father, Holy Spirit. Many of us we sing the song about our Father. We say He's a good, good Father.

    Deep down, some of us are not really believing it. Even on top of that, He might be singing over us and you're good, good children and we certainly wouldn't believe that. We thank you that, that's what you call us your children and you love us and you cover us and you wash us and you cleanse us and you make us new. I'm asking that powerful miracle to take place.

    I'm going to ask the worship team to come now if they would and we'll sing a song and then pastor Nick come back, but I just pray in the name of Jesus, that there would be a transition tonight. That the shift will begin to take place. Even if it takes a little detox, how many of you will be willing to detox if it gives you a better life? Anybody at all? Couple of you here, yes.

    I'm willing to go through a little bit of pain, to get to the outcome, to get to the victory, to get to the clean mind and get to the clear heart, and get to the vision that He has for my life. Father, we just thank you that you're going to do this work. You're going to do a work of grace.    

  • Psalm 91 – A Psalm of Spiritual Warfare

     

    Claude Houde

    Spiritual warfare can hit us when we least expect it, or worse yet, we might not even realize we're in the middle of a spiritual battle. Pastor Claud Houde talks about how believers can identify attacks and do battle against the forces of evil in their minds, hearts and lives.

  • The Cross and the Covenant

     

    David Wilkerson (1931-2011)

    Slipping into works-based righteousness is very easy for any believer, particularly when we are feeling condemned in our spirit or shaken in our faith. David Wilkerson talks about how the disciples began arguing about who was the greatest shortly after the Transfiguration, and he points out how many of us struggle with the same fearful need to prove our salvation. 

  • God's Divine Order in the Chaos of Life

     

    Gary Wilkerson

    Gary Wilkerson examines Job's cry to God and God's response. God points out the overwhelming behemoth and leviathan that Job could've never overcome on his own and then points Job to his own authority and power in the world.

    If we attempt to take on demonic powers without God's authority, it's a struggle we'll never forget. However, we are called to be Davids with Goliaths. We are called to do battle against evil and chaos as the children of God. That can be deeply frightening, but the Bible says over and over, "Don't be afraid."

    Where there is chaos, you are called to bring order as a child of God. Gary talks about how we walk this out without becoming overwhelmed.

  • One on One | With Failure

     

    Tim Dilena

    Failure is a common denominator for everyone, so why does our loving Father allow us to fail over and over? How does he continue to use us in the midst of our botched work? Pastor Tim Dilena discusses the answers in this week's sermon about how the Bible handles failure.

  • He Will Show You Things to Come

     

    Carter Conlon

    Circumstance-based Christianity rises and falls on hope in this world. Yet, when our world is shaken and the things in it, we can be shaken, too. Carter Conlon reminds us in this sermon to look up and have a vision beyond the circumstances around us.

    I want to talk to you this morning about the Holy Spirit and in particular something Jesus said about the Holy Spirit, that He will show you things to come. John, Chapter 16, please, if you'll turn there. John, Chapter 16, "Father, I thank You for the strength of Your Holy Spirit. I thank You for the vision. You said in the temple that day I've come, the spirit of the Lord is upon me to give sight to those that are blind, and so God, for whatever part of our spiritual eyes that we can't see, would you open them? Would You help us, Lord? Would You give us heaven's perspective on life, time and eternity? Would You deliver us from the smallness of our own vision and show us things to come?"

    God, I'm asking You for a quickening in my physical body. I'm asking Lord for a quickening in everyone who's gathered here so that we can hear these words today, give us great grace. God, we're going to need it now. Give us great grace for the hour in which we now live and give us spiritual sight in Jesus' name. Amen.

    John 16 beginning of verse 12, Jesus said these words to his disciples, "I still have many things to say to you, but you cannot bear them now. In other words, you're not in a condition to hear them." At this point, his disciples were-- they all had their own focus. They all had a sense. James and John are probably still marginally at least thinking about sitting at His right hand and His left. John, the beloved, has a sense of his own dedication and love, which is not really complete.

    Peter's making boasts of loyalty and love that he's not going to be able to fulfill. He says, "I have a lot I want to tell you, I have a lot I want to speak to you, but you're not ready to hear it yet. Your ears are not open. Your eyes are not open because you're still focused on the immediate.

    You're focused on what's right before you in the natural, so you can't bear them." However, verse 13 when he, the spirit of truth has come, he will guide you into all truth. For He will not speak on his own authority, but whatever he hears, he will speak and he will tell you things to come. He will glorify me for he will take of what is mine and declare it to you. All things that the Father has are mine, therefore, I said that he will take of Mine and will declare it to you.

    "I'm going to win a victory for you." Christ was telling his disciples, "I'm going to return to the right hand of God and everything will be under my authority. There will be a tremendous inheritance given to me of the father. When he raises me from the dead. I will return to sit at his right hand and everything, everything, that he gives me is now going to belong to my people, my church, my body. The spirit of God that I'm sending to you will show you some of these things to come. You and I, of course, can't see them all. There's just no way we could ever understand. I heard a message one time of a man that had said these words, he said, "Take somebody who's never seen is completely blind.

    Never heard, never tasted, never smelled. His entire senses are shut down and stand them on the top of the tallest building in New York City, for example, then snap your fingers and open all of your senses at one time. It would be a sensory explosion like you and I can't even imagine." He said, "Now, multiply that by 100 billion and that's about what it will be like the moment we leave this earth and appear in the presence of God."

    The Scripture says, "We will know in that day as we are known, mysteries will be resolved. Questions will be answered. There'll be an explosion of knowledge in our minds and we will realize, I think at that point how small in a sense our thinking has been in comparison to what God is going to release and what God is going to reveal to us, in us and through us. What a day that is going to be." Praise be to God for that day.

    Now when the spirit of God comes into a person's life, he starts to show us things to come. He starts to tell us that old things in our life will pass away and all things will become new. He starts to show us the prison doors that once held us will have to let us go. Wounds that once bruised us don't have the power to do that in our lives anymore. He starts to show us a plan and a purpose that God has for each life and the abundance of supply that God has already given us in Christ Jesus to achieve to the fullest everything he's called us to do.

    Whatever God's called you to do, you will be able to do that by the spirit of God upon you and within you and the promise of God given to you. There's nothing can stop you just like he says to the church in Philadelphia, you have a little strength, but I've opened the door before you and no one can close that door and I will do something so profound in your life that those who do not worship God will bow at your feet and have to acknowledge that I have loved you.

    That is something to come in everyone's life. Thank God for that with all of our hearts today, it will reveal to you power, to accomplish. Behold, I give you power to tread on serpents and scorpions. There's a revelation of the power of God available in Jesus Christ to stand up against the darkness and by the grace of God inside of our hearts to see it pushed back one more time into the sea.

    He will give you an eye endurance and the Holy Spirit will show us that endurance, that ability that God gives called long-suffering. You know what it means in the Greek long-suffering. You know what it means in the Hebrew long-suffering. That's what it means. That means the ability to endure things that others around you without the spirit of God could not endure, gives you the ability to bear even with one another in the body of Christ and to believe and to hope and to endure.

    When you would have in the natural have written somebody off in the Kingdom of God, nobody gets written off. There's something of God that puts a vision in our heart and not just for ourselves, but for others around us. He'll give us an understanding of the endless supply of provision. He'll unlock, to us the scriptures, and even in the old testament, we'll see the oil pouring into the lamps and pouring an inexhaustible supply of oil symbolic of the presence of the Holy Spirit. The more we give out, the more God gives in, the more we let go, the more he puts it in our hands to let go.

    It's truly, truly an amazing journey to walk with God. He will show us strength in the midst of our battle. I love that song. It may look like I'm surrounded, but I'm surrounded by you, David the king saw it when he said in Psalm 23 verse five he prepares a table before me in the presence of mine enemies. I can be surrounded and they can all have their swords drawn and wish me harm, but all they can do is butter the biscuit in my hand, with their sword.

    He has prepared the table before me and there's nothing they can do because no weapon formed against us shall prosper and every tongue that rises against us in judgment, we shall condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord because their righteousness is of me, says God. I have cleansed them. The Holy Spirit when we come to Christ, when he becomes our Lord and Savior, the spirit of God comes into our earth and vessel unlocks the treasure of this book and we begin to see things to come. Now he will also tell you about things to come that are beyond this present world. 2nd Corinthians 4:18 Paul says, "While we do not look at the things which are seen, but things which are not seen for the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal."

    In the book of Revelation, there was a church called Laodicea that was a problematic church in one sense because what had happened to this church is that their eyes were fixed on the abundance of this world only, they came to the understanding that in Christ you will have a supply, in Christ you will be provided for. In Christ, there will be this constant measure of everything you need as you seek first the Kingdom of God and his righteousness.

    All the things that you need will be added unto you, but the problem with this particular church is their eyes were fixed on this world only. They weren't looking above this world. You remember Abraham, the father of faith is given a promise of God. I'm going to bless you. I'm going to multiply you. I'm going to do something so profound in your life that you're going to be a blessing to the whole world and you and I, of course, know that we are because of Christ, through his lineage, we are the fulfillment of that promise.

    He took him one day and caused him to go outside and says, look up, and as many stars as you see in heaven, your descendants are going to be like that. It was something not of this world was something above this world. It was something beyond this world. The Holy Spirit was showing him things to come. Now, traveling with him out of his home place of dwelling into this place of promise as he saw it was his nephew, Lot. Lot was part of the family. Lot would have been told there's going to be a blessing come upon us and the blessing is going to be so profound. It's going to touch the whole known world. Lot would have known that he was invited. He was a partaker of this journey.

    It came to the point where, physically speaking, they had so much cattle and such that they couldn't dwell in one place. There was an insufficient supply of grass. Abraham said to Lot. He said, "Lot, lift up your eyes and look and choose where you want to go." Lot lifted up his eyes. His eyes only lifted up so far. He had this doctrinal perspective that all the blessing of this life was to be found in this world.

    He chose a city. He went to a place called Sodom and Gomorrah and raised his family there. Folks, if we don't lift our eyes so high and it's only this world that becomes our source of supply and provision, one day an enemy came in and captivated that place and took him and his family away. If all you can see is of this world, if your happiness is only because you have a car or you think you're going to get one and you have a house and you have this and have money in the bank and you have your retirement plan, I'm telling you there's a day that might come and take all of that away.

    It can happen. It can happen. If that's where your eyes are focused, that can all be gone in an hour, in an hour of time. What do you think it mattered when the towers were struck on 9/11/ 2001? What do you think the people on the upper floor who had about an hour left to live? What do you think it mattered anymore how high they had gotten on the financial chain?

    What do you think it mattered how many colleges their kids were in, or how many cars they had, or how many countries they could visit? Do you think any of it mattered at that point any longer? No. It can all be taken away. Matter of fact, the Prophet Isaiah says in one hour Babylon is going to be judged. In one hour. Such great wealth is going to all be taken away in one hour. In one hour it's going to all be gone.

    The Laodicean church thought that they had it all made because they were rich and creased in goods and they said to themselves, "We have need of nothing." They had no idea how weak their doctrinal position was because of their focus. Christ himself knew that if their worldly security was taken away, so would their confidence be taken away as well.

    I'm telling you, the Bible declares, a day is coming when everything that can be shaken in is going to be shaken. That only that which cannot be shaken might remain. Proverbs Chapter 23:5 says, "Will you set your eyes on that which is not for rich will certainly make themselves wings. They'll fly away like an eagle towards heaven." I Corinthians 3:13 says, "The fire will test each one's work of what sort it is."

    I remember Pastor Teresa and I coming home from, we're in full-time ministry now and we were preaching in eastern Canada. We had worked for 12 years to build a home, a physical house. We'd renovated this old farmhouse. We had added onto it. We had modified it. We took 12 years to get it where it was finally finished. It was a nice home. We came home from traveling to find it burnt to the ground. Everything.

    God in His mercy spared our children. Praise his name. Everything we had worked for was gone in one moment of time. Even the fire department said they'd never seen such a total-consuming fire in their history. It was a windy night and the whole house caved inward and then just there was nothing left. Everything was gone. Just the foundation was left.

    Everything of the house was gone. The fire will test your work to see you of what sort it is. Where's your confidence now? I remember we had to stay with another pastor and his wife with our three children. I remember coming out and going for a jog, because I used to run back then and I said, "Lord, I don't even have a toothbrush, but I tell you one thing, I have sought first your kingdom and your righteousness and you tell me that all things will be added unto me that I need, so I'm putting it all in your hands.

    I'm not going to try to figure this thing out." I'm telling you, I've seen the Lord take it away and I've seen the Lord give it back, and I've seen it taken away and I've seen it giving back and I've seen it taken away and I've seen it given back.

    [applause]

    I've also, through these experiences, seen something a little more than what this world has got to offer. Thank God. We still have a nice house, but I know that can be gone. I've lived it already. I know twice, as a matter of fact, two and a half times. We lost our second house to mold. Toxic mold, if you can believe that. Gone. House condemned.

    Then we move across the river Weehawken. Finally, we're settled. Hurricane Sandy came and wiped out the whole first floor. We live on a lake and house is the bottom of our house about five feet above the water level. I said to Pastor Teresa one day, "What possibly could go wrong now?"

    [laughter]

    It's all stuff folks. If that's where your focus is, it can be taken away. Do you understand? If that's where your focus is, if your happiness in God is just because of your job, because of that relationship, because you feel healthy and strong, because you see something on the horizon for your future, you've got a great career ahead of you. That can all be taken away in a moment of time. Sorrow comes to every door eventually.

    Do you know that? Sickness comes to everybody. Unless you get raptured and you're healthy, you're probably going to get sick and die like every one of us in this room one day. Relationships are lost. Loved ones die. Jobs are lost. If our security is in any of these things, even though many of them do come from God, if our eyes are not lifted higher than that, our confidence can be taken away and it can be shaken.

    That's why Jesus said to the church at Laodicea, I counsel you to buy of me gold refined in the fire. Buy of me truth that has been proven. Buy of me something that's of eternal value, not just temporary value in this world. Buy of me something deeper and anoint your eyes with eyesalve that you may see. God, you said, in the temple that day, that you had come to give sight to the blind.

    Lord, if my vision is limited, would you touch my eyes with that eye salve? Would you help me to see something beyond this life? Would you take me to a place where the storms may come, the waves may rise, but would you found my life upon that rock that cannot be taken down by the storms of this life? Lord, would you do something in my life so that I'm not riding this wave of circumstance-dependent Christianity?

    Take me farther than this. Further our eternal things in the heavens that are promised to each one of us. Though things can be lost in this world, they cannot be lost in that one. God, help me to lift my eyes higher than Lot. Help me God to lift my eyes up the way Abraham did and to see something of the heavens. Something of you God. Something that is promised. Paul said in 1 Corinthians 15:19, "If in this life only we have hope in Christ, we are of all men most pitiable."

    In other words, if our hope is only in the things we see around us, then when it's all shaken. We're going to be shaken with us. Paul moves always to those things which are eternal, which can never be taken away. He states this way. Romans 8:18, he says, "For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that shall be revealed in us."

    Paul had this vision. He saw something coming in the future. He saw that-- You can read about it in Corinthians that this earthly body is going to give way to a heavenly body. We're going to be sown in corruption, raised in incorruption. He saw things. He tells us in his own testimony that he was lifted to the third heavens. He said, "I saw things that are not lawful to speak about. I can't write about them. There are no words in the human vocabulary to describe them. That's why it's not lawful to write about it or speak about. He saw something.

    God, in His Mercy, gave him an eternal vision so that he could endure the sufferings he had to endure in this life. He was stoned. He was beaten. He was shipwrecked and he finished the end of his life in the sense imprisoned with only a pen and some parchment to write to his friends. He says, "The sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that shall be revealed in us."

    While in captivity, he wrote words to others. For example, to the Thessalonian church that he knew they were beginning to go into persecution, and he knew the persecution was going to become severe for these people of God at this time. Then he says these words in 1 Thessalonians 4:16 to 18, "For the Lord himself will descend from heaven with a shout and with the voice of an archangel, with the trumpet of God, and the dead in Christ shall rise first, then we who are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord, in the air, and thus we shall always be with the Lord. Therefore, comfort one another with these words.

    He knew they were going to suffer, but he was saying to the testimony in church, suffering is only temporary, and there's a day coming. When God's going to look down and say, “That's enough son, go get your church, go get your bride.” The angel is going to rise up, and with a shout, a shout like you and I think it's a shout of victory. It's a hallelujah like you've never heard in your lifetime.

    [applause]

    With a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trumpet of God, and the dead in Christ shall rise. Everyone who went into the ground, maybe they went in and sorrow, maybe they had questions in their heart. Maybe it was a hard finish. It can be hard if you die of certain diseases, it can be a long season of suffering. You might find yourself in the ground that way one day, but one day, one day, there's going to be a shout in heaven. One day your King is going to shout. One day the trumpet of God is going to sound, and you are going to come out of the ground and rise up into the air. Praise be to God.

    One day there's going to be a group of people meeting at a church just like this in New York City. One day, unexpectedly the trumpet is going to sound, the archangel is going to shout. One day, we're going to rise up with the dead in Christ and meet Christ in the air and so shall we always be with the Lord. Wherefore, comfort one another with these words, hallelujah.

    In other words, weeping may endure for a night, but joy, joy, joy, comes again in the morning. Hallelujah. Heaven is our home and eternity with God is our future. Come what may in this life. Come what may. Come with famine or disease or darkness or war or social disorder, whatever it is, it comes, come what may. It's all temporary, and none of it is worthy to be compared with the glory, the glory that shall be revealed in us. Hallelujah to the Lamb of God.

    [applause]

    Paul says in 1 Corinthians 2:9-10, as it is written, “Eyes not seen, nor ears heard, nor have entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for those who love Him. But God has revealed them to us through His Spirit, for the Spirit searches all things, the deep things of God.” In other words, we who have the Holy Spirit of God know something that those who don't have the Spirit of God don't know. They have no idea what awaits them, and they have no idea what awaits us.

    What an incredible day that is going to be. Hallelujah. Listen to the words of Jesus in John 14:2-3, “In my father's house, are many mansions. If it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself, where I am there you may be also.” Listen, there's construction going on right now in heaven. Right now.

    [applause]

    Pastor: Right now. For everyone of you that comes to Christ, every one of you who are born again, when your name is written in the Book of Life, God's Book of Life, I don't know how they do it. Maybe there's a call made to the construction go. Start another mansion. Praise be to God. There's a mansion.

    When God says a mansion, He means a mansion. A mansion prepared for you in glory. If those mansions are so big, I don't think you can ever find all the rooms. I think there's food in every room. You can dig into that refrigerator right into the back and it always stays fresh. It never spoils up there. Our bodies are opaque. That's my opinion. You can eat it tastes good and just falls right through you onto the floor, disappears. I don't think you gain weight up there. Praise be to God. There is no delight that God will withhold from His children.

    “In my Father's house are many mansions. I go to prepare a place for you, for you, for you. Then where I am, there you may be also.” Hallelujah to the Lamb of God. Glory to the name of Jesus. You don't have to cut the grass. There you don't have to vacuum, nothing ever gets dirty up there. Praise be to God. You walk out on streets and gold, what does it matter you can spend it anyway.

    [laughter]

    When He says a mansion. When He says a mansion. When He says a mansion. The early church knew these things. They did because they suffered. People during different wars suffered. People have had to go through times in history of suffering. People have been persecuted. That's why they could write these songs, I've got a mansion just over the hilltop in that bright land where I'll never grow old And someday yonder will nevermore wander but walk on streets that are pure as gold. Hallelujah to the Lamb of God.

    Lastly, the apostle John, who leaned on Jesus' chest at the Last Supper. John who loved Him and he knew that Jesus loved him. He describes himself as the apostle that Jesus loved. He knew that in his heart. Now he's served God all his life and he's at that 80 years old. He's exiled to a prison under now called Patmos. From what I read about that prison, it was vile. It was cold. It was damp. It was dark. It was despairing. It was uncomfortable in the extreme. John could have said, “God is this how you treat those who love you? Is this how it ends up? I serve you all my life, and this is where I end up in prison, cold, disregarded, old.”

    The scripture says on the Lord's Day, that John was in the Spirit. The Spirit of God, remember that when He comes, He will show you things to come. John, even though he's in prison, he could write these words in Revelation 21, “I saw a new heaven and a new earth. For the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no more sea.” In other words, there was nothing more because this is an island for him and it would be impossible to escape this place.

    John saying in some measure, at least anyway, there's nothing more that separates us from God, and from life and from the freedom that He has for us for eternity. Then I John, it says, saw the Holy City, New Jerusalem coming down out of heaven from God,  prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. I heard a loud voice from heaven saying, Behold, the tabernacle of God is with men, and He will dwell with them, and they will be as people and God Himself will be their God. God will wipe away every tear from their eyes, there will be no more death, nor sorrow, no more crying, no more pain. For the former things are passed away. He will show you things to come. Weeping may endure for a night but joy, unspeakable joy is coming your way in the morning.

    Ask the Holy Spirit to show your place soon, and very soon it's coming to all of us. Our life is just a little vapor on the scale of eternity. It's just a little blip on the screen. That's all, it is our life here on this earth. Here there’s sorrow, here there are trials, here there's difficulty, but there's a day coming that's forever. It never ends. In that place, there's no more, you can’t cry there. You can’t cry. Think about that.

    I know some of you cry every night. Some of you cry every morning. Some of you cry on the subway on the way to work. When you get there you can't cry. There's going to be no capability, there’ll be nothing to cry about. I want you to think about that. He will show you. Remember He was showing you things to come. There'll be no more death.

    No more death. You don't go to a funeral ever. Ever. All the undertakers would be out of business.

    [applause]

    All the casket makers are going to have to find new work. Flower people will go bankrupt because there are no more funerals up there. There's no more weddings either.

    [laughter]

    No sorrow, nothing that can make your heart heavy, no crying, no more pain. I'm going to speak to those who are, you live with pain. You live with arthritis, you live with various and varying degrees of pain, whether it's internal pain or whether it's physical pain. You live with pain but that won't be forever, there's a day coming, there's no more pain. The absence of pain.

    I don't fully understand that but if I read it literally, that means if I bang my head on the door, it doesn't hurt. There's no more pain. Then he was sat on the throne, said, "Behold, I make all things new, write, for these words are true and faithful," and he said to me, "It's done. I'm the Alpha and Omega, the beginning of the end and I will give of the fountain of the water of life freely to him who thirsts."

    He who needs strength, she who needs strength, the person that needs an eye salve anointing to say, "God, I need to see something beyond this world, I need to see something beyond my present condition, my struggles, my trials. Oh, God, don't let me be captivated by the things of this world so that if they're shaken, I'll be shaken along with them. God, give me the ability to look higher. Help me to see this place that you talked to all of us about, that you are preparing for us. A place where your neighbors are all nice."

    [laughter]

    Come on now, there are no liars up there. Every lawyer will be out of work because nobody has any disputes, no boundary disputes, no property disputes, nobody is suing anybody up there. Every police officer will be out of work, there's no crime up there. Every judge will be out of work, there's nothing to judge, it's all been judged and forgiven. Hallelujah.

    You just think of all the occupations, so what are we going to do up there? I don't know, it just says we're going to praise him day and night with the angels and we're going to rule and reign with Christ forever. That's what the Bible tells me.

    [applause]

    That is not fiction, that is a fact. That's what's coming your way, that's your future. That's forever. You may weep for a little while, your heart may be broken for a season, your body may struggle and suffer for a moment. That dream job, that dream relationship might be lost but there's something coming not far down the road.

    [applause].

    When you get there, you're going to say, "Oh, thank God I didn't give up, thank God I listened to the word of God and lifted my eyes just a little bit higher than the things of this world that can satisfy. I saw something of God, Hallelujah to the lamb of God. I'm starting to see it now more and more. Thank God."

    Turn your eyes upon Jesus, Look full in His wonderful face And the things of earth will grow strangely dim in the light of his glory and grace.

    [singing] Oft times the day seems long,
    our trials hard to bear.
    We're tempted to complain,
    to murmur and despair
    but Christ will soon appear
    to catch his bride away.
    All cheers forever
    over in God's eternal day.

    [applause]

    It will be worth it all
    when we see Jesus,
    life's trials will seem so small
    when we see Christ.

    One glimpse of His dear face,
    all sorrow will erase,
    so bravely run the race
    till we see Christ.

    Life’s day will soon be old,
    our storms forever passed
    and we'll cross the grey divide
    to glory safe at last.

    We'll share the joys of heaven, Hallelujah.
    A harp, a home, a crown.
    The tempter will be banished, Hallelujah.
    We'll lay our burdens down.

    It will be worth it all
    when we see Jesus,
    life's trials will seem so small
    when we see Christ.

    One glimpse of His dear face,
    all sorrow will erase,
    so bravely run the race
    till we see Christ.

    It will be worth it all
    when we see Jesus, 
    life's trials will seem so small
    when we see Christ.

    One glimpse of His dear face,
    All sorrow will erase,
    So bravely run the race
    till we see Christ.

    [applause]

    Hallelujah. I want to give an altar call today from people who just need comfort. You need a vision beyond your present circumstance or you're not going to be able to make it. You need eyes to see some things that only the Holy Spirit can reveal to you. You need to be able to go to bed at night and say, "Oh God, what a future awaits me. What a day, an eternal day is coming my way. What a mansion, God, you've prepared for me in glory. What an eternity, Lord, you've prepared for me." Paul said, "Comfort one another with these words."

    [applause]

    Listen, don't give up, don't ever give up. The best advice I can ever give you. Some people seem to have it easy and others have it hard, and some have a half-and-half life, but one day soon we'll be gathered together at the throne of God. We will remember this moment and we will thank God that we didn't give up. Thank God that life, it was worth it.

    Remember the Bible says that sorrow may endure for a night, weeping may endure for a night but joy, there's a guarantee of joy that's going to come again in the morning. Praise be to God.

    Father, I just pray for my brothers and sisters at this altar and in this church, Lord. God open our eyes in this church, Lord, open our eyes and show us heavenly things Lord, eternal things. Help us, Lord, not to just look at our everyday circumstances any longer. Not that we ignore them but let them not have the final word on everything Lord in our minds and in our hearts, God.

    I pray for comfort Lord, that only you can give God, to those at this altar that are struggling or suffering or just living in a hard place God. I just pray, God, that you just comfort the way that only you can, and we open our hearts to it, Lord and we won't push you away when you want to comfort us, Lord. God, thank you for it, in Jesus name. Amen.

    [applause]

  • Getting Healed

     

    Gary Wilkerson

    Many of us have been wounded. The Bible has promised us freedom, but often it feels like we’re still held back by scars. Pastor Gary Wilkerson talks about how God uses truth to set us free from the damage in our past, but how God also allows the snake to be in our garden. The automatic question is “Why? Why would God allow there to be a snake in our lives that tempts or wounds us?” There are four major “snakes” in our lives:

    1.    Fear or anxiety

    2.    Rejection

    3.    Isolation

    4.    Shame or self-loathing 

    The Bible’s most common command is “Fear not” even in the face of great challenges. God wants to show us the strength his Holy Spirit has within us to make us more than conquerors.

  • America And Its Children Need Deliverance

     

    Carter Conlon

    God’s people are meant to be a light and blessing to the world. Even the darkest, most entrenched parts of society can be overcome by faith as small as mustard seed. All God needed to overturn pervasive culture in the book of Acts was 120 common, ordinary people who were willing to let their hearts be overcome by the Holy Spirit. In this passionate exhortation, Pastor Carter reminds Christians that we are called to live for the benefit of others.

  • One on One | With A Past That is Always With Us

     

    Tim Dilena

    Jesus knew exactly what people needed not only because he was God but because he truly listened to people's pain. As believers, we are called to mimic Jesus' life, and part of this is learning to ask questions and really listen to people's answers and pray for them. Pastor Tim Dilena talks this week about scripture where Jesus names himself the Great Physician.